Stripes and Heavy Hearts




Since waking up Monday morning to hear of yet another senseless tragedy in America, I am left with a heavy heart and can't stop crying these past few days. What is happening in our world right now? I can't stop thinking about everyone affected by this. Think about it. Over 500+ injured, 58 dead... triple that amount just to get a perspective on how many people have been touched by this awful incident. As much as I love my work, creating and publishing content without as much as a discussion, let alone a stupid fucking meme with hearts and prayers, is definitely hitting below the belt. I've never seen so many fashionista's Insta-stories and/or social media posts giving 'shoutouts' to the victims and families (or nothing at all, just completely unacknowledging them)... only to go on about their daily lives and not even mention any ways to help like donating blood, contacting your elected representatives to support mental health or stricter gun control policies, or other ways to donate, such as natural disaster relief funds to the victims of Hurricane Harvey. And why do I feel like the ones that preach the most about this shit are the ones that aren't really helping to begin with? I know that sounds pretty harsh, but it is sort of the reality of the situation. Now, I AM NOT saying that there isn't anyone out there, with the power and reach, to spread information like wildfire in a scenario like this, because there are, and kudos to you for taking the time to do so, but there's a lot of you that really don't care about anyone but yourself. And I can attest to this because I'm seeing it unfold right before my very eyes, unfortunately.

Whenever something tragic like this happens, I immediately think of my loved ones. Family first. Don't you? Now for those who don't know me that well, I don't have any family. They're all gone. Either physically or through tough life predicaments, I am left with no one but myself. I don't have a single soul to call and cry about my problems to or have a mommy or daddy to help me out when I'm financially in a pickle. I've been on my own for a long time now. So I tend to get pretty depressed sometimes and will shut down. Especially in a time like now where all I want is to talk to my parents and hug them and tell them how much I love and miss them. I need some form of solidarity when feeling alone and confused. There is no love like one from a parent. A good parent. The most important family is not the one you were born into, but the one you choose. I have a small circle of friends that I trust and hold very dear to, but very few have entered into this circle and have stayed there. Loyalty is hard to come by these days and I'm finding myself losing more and more hope with the world we're living in. 


Sure you can be an advocate of some kind, whether it's donating your time, money or both to organizations that will help carry that through, but to me, the best and most important way to help right now is to constantly BE KIND and LOVING. Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. So be good to each other. Hug your loved ones extra tight and never forget to be grateful for your life and others. And be forgiving. I've talked about this in the past, because it really hits close to home. It's not about forgiving and forgetting what's hurt you, but more about letting go and being able to move forward. Self-love is something I too have struggled with my whole life, and I'm slowly but surely starting to see my worth and will no longer waste my time on those who don't see this. If they don't look at you like you're magic, walk away... or rather, RUN away. Doesn't matter if they're blood-related or not. 


Steve Sisolak, Chair of the Clark County Commission, has set up a GoFundMe page to raise money for the victims and their families. It had collected more than $3 million as of Tuesday morning. Officials in Las Vegas say there has been an overwhelming turnout for blood donations -- some donors waited in line for more than 6 hours -- and no more blood is needed right now. Those looking for information about loved ones still missing in the Las Vegas area can call 1-800-536-9488. If you live in the Las Vegas area, you can volunteer transportation and other help to victims through this Facebook page. Please help in any way you can, it's not just about the immediate support, but for the more trying, long-term ones. The victims need us and we need them. Please remember how amazingly special you are and that you are LOVED. Want to talk? Leave a comment or send me a private message through social media or email. I'm here for you. 

*Go to Direct Relief to donate money or American Red Cross to donate food and/or clothing for the victims of Hurricane Harvey. They are also asking people to donate coloring books, puzzles, and other toys to the shelters for the kids.