The Writer's Desk

I don't know about you but I am so glad it's a 3-day work week. Life has been busy and stressful, so the idea of a cook-a-thon of some of my most favorite eats is more than thrilling. Yes, I mean this in the most non-sarcastic way. It relaxes me. And by celebrating and giving thanks, though we should be thankful every day, it's always so nice to reflect during this time of year. Because we do have so much to be grateful for.

New York City is pretty chilly today. The perks of working from home as a writer and blogger has it's pros and cons, and I will still take a break and get out of the apartment. I'll go for a run or a walk with MaQ and some of his other dog friends, or grab something to eat, or just to people watch. These daily activities are constant but today, I don't know; maybe because it's awfully cold (supposedly these are normal temps for Nov, or is it? Can't keep track anymore thanks to global warming) or because in my mind it's already Hump Day, but it was one of those days where it felt like Sunday. A case of the Monday's if you will.

So I stayed in my Calvin's, or rather PJ's I guess, and wrapped myself up in one of my hubby's shirts, then went to work. Can't get cozier than that! Along with comfort, as a writer, I also need seclusion. Here are a few more of my daily essentials I always need at my desk - the writer's desk.

My Microsoft Surface Pro Tablet. This little guy packs a mean punch. I do all of my blogging, writing, research, editing, and even conference calls on it. It is vital in my every day life. Without out, I don't know how I'd be organizing my crazy life!

Paper. Lots of paper. Sometimes I'll use my trusty ole' typewriter, but it's for rare occasions. I use paper to jot down ideas, timelines, research/case studies, or just to make a checklist or to-do list of some kind, whether it's blog-related or a simple grocery list, as a writer, I've always been constantly around the stuff.

Music. Not just any type of music. If it's just getting the day started or building a rough draft of a blog post, I'll usually listen to what's new in the music world. I do, however, appreciate every genre in music. When it's time to buckle down and work on my novel, it'll always be a certain theme in tune with what I'm writing about. I have a deep passion for Classical music, but also go for original soundtracks or instrumental music. Lyrical music while trying to write a chapter doesn't work well for me.

Candles. Any time of the year, I adore candles. I think aromas and scents can set a tone or deliver a certain essence in the environment you want to create. Plus, they bring warmth and light to any room, which is always a good thing especially being a writer. We spend a lot of time alone! ;) All kidding aside, I have been using Yankee Candles since college. They're my favorite besides Diptyque.

My Leica Coffee Mug. We received this as a gift in our first year of marriage from a dear friend. I love the size because it holds more coffee than any other mug we own. A writer's dream, or rather, fuel to burn the midnight oil! Ha ha!

Greenery or Flowers. Visually they are pretty to look at. I write a lot about how to kill people. I need something that'll bring me back from those sometimes dark places. Plus it's the girly girl in me. Now older, I've become quite fond of plants and the idea of growth. It's also just another great way to style up your place without looking like you're trying too hard.

My i-Phone 6. I know... BAD idea to ever have a phone near you while trying to get some work done. But it's my way of staying in touch with the world. And I do give myself time intervals. Every two-three hours, depending how much writing I do, I'll take a small 15 minute break.

My Ray-Ban eyeglasses. What can I say. I'm getting older. I need these around me more and more. I'm near-sighted, so it's not a matter of not being able to focus at a close object but rather one that is at a distance. I leave CNN on mute in the background. I'm addicted to what's going on in the world because I think it imperatively matters. So, from time to time, I'll need them to see what's going on the TV screen. :)

I would've asked MaQ to join me in the photo but he was far too busy sunbathing closer toward the windows. I didn't want to wake up my angel bear. He sends is love though! <3

Have a short and happy work week everyone!

Love & xx's,

maQ + suz

Remembrance of Trinkets Past

Firstly, I want to thank my readers from the bottom of my heart for your love and support these past few days. Times like these are proven difficult, but because of your acknowledgement and acts of care, it makes the pain endurable. It may never fully go away, but knowing I have people who have my back: please know I will always have yours. Thank you. I am grateful. Always grateful. Just thank you. 

I get out of bed every morning because I want to get up and talk with each and every one of you; to share with you all my life experiences, whether day-to-day or in reflection of the past or future - it's the good, the bad, and yeah, the ugly. What I love about social media, is its power to provide knowledge amidst helping/contributing to the world we live in and to the people who are in it. It should be an efficient tool, not a weapon to manufacture or destroy us.

Here's something I discovered I'd like to share with you today. An amazing company called, CaseApp, allows you to design your own phone case! You can use someone's previously created design or you can custom make one yourself! It can include typography, a collage of some sort... let your imagination run wild! I've been loving the marble trend but I wanted to create something with a little more spunk, basically including a bit more of my style into it.

Since green is my ultimate favorite color besides black, I chose a combination of the two! And voila! Doesn't it look so chic? I think it's perfect for the holiday season! Great for Christmas stuffers/ smaller gift ideas. Want to make your custom iPhone case? Don't have an iPhone? Not to worry, they carry other phone types too! Why not use my promotional code for a 20% discount?! Just enter SPIEGOSKI20 before you checkout. Click HERE to get started! :)

But before you go there's more to these photos than just a phone case. Every year during the month of November, in honor of my mother, I get statice flowers. Statice is also known as a herb and is sometimes called "sea lavender". According to Teleflora, "Its botanical name is derived from the Greek word "limonium," meaning meadow, referring to the plants original habitat and likely why this versatile flower is also called marsh-rosemary." Having a deeper appreciation for flowers and more particularly, in the language of flowers, statice symbolizes remembrance.

I discovered these flowers nearly ten years ago at a girlfriend's apartment, who also displayed them out in the open, in memory of someone she lost when she was only a little girl: her father. Since then, statice has kind of stuck with me. The flower itself is dried up and feels like confetti, yet they're so incredibly beautiful to me. With my mother's profound love for flowers and gardening, I always am reminded of her when I see these and many other kinds of flowers. I can't help but carry some in the house this time of year. I can't help but always have some kind of plant life in the house now. 💜

Every piece of jewelry except the Twin Tiger Bangle belonged to my mother. My father had gifted her with these (and plenty more) throughout their years together. Birthdays, Valentine's Days, Christmases and Anniversaries, they actually eloped in Vegas on Christmas Eve - so Rock -n- Roll by the way guys! These were passed down to me after her passing, some I can barely ever wear to this day because they are far too precious to me. I'll wear the Movado watch for a special occasion of some kind, like when I got engaged. (Oh the irony!) Everything comes in full circle, doesn't it? I believe those heart earrings were a Valentine's Day gift.

The sapphire ring is encrusted with diamonds at the top edge of gold band. This was a Christmas gift to my mother and I received this as a Christmas gift after she passed. My father had given this ring to the two women he loved most in life. I always found this incredibly touching. I still carry, in my memento of mementos, the hand-written letter he wrote when he gave me this ring.

I think the memory of someone is always possible when it comes to jewelry, trinkets, flowers, etc. These tokens of remembrance are significant, and they don't have to be someone. It can be something else, perhaps a place or a first time experience. I have a girlfriend who after becoming quite successful, bought herself a Rolex just because she could. Why? It's not the materialism that comes with the territory, but meaning behind it. In her eyes, time is money. It was now a constant reminder of her sense of urgency. Life is short, so you better damn well make the most of it. 

Like my new phone case from CaseApp, I will now always have the memory of my first time designing my own cover to my iPhone! My meaning behind it? To me green is a peaceful color. Serenity, Light, Earth. And black is well, black. Dark. The opposite of every other color. It's my own version of yin and yang. ☯

Love & xx's,

maQ + suz

Please Look After 엄마

Today is my mother's death anniversary. Both my parents, sadly, are deceased. My father unexpectedly passed away in July of 2013. I'm completely estranged from my only brother and any other family relative. With all the sickening, cruel, harsh news in the world this week, ranging from another earthquake in Japan to the devastating Beirut bombing, to the atrocious terror attacks in Paris, I find myself contemplating a lot about my family. This is supposed to be my flesh and blood but they've barely spoken two words to me in years. Aren't we supposed to come together, to strengthen our ties and support one another? This world leaves me more and more in doubt every single day. I see humans, but I do not see humanity. Where is the love? Perhaps, upstairs... are you watching over us? Because sometimes it really doesn't seem like it. Especially as of late. Are you with me? Are you with us? I am with you. I am with all of you. We are all valuable. Precious. Everyone counts and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. I must; we must all keep faith in the Good and remain in the Light.

Exactly ten years ago today, I watched my mother take her last breath. The last thing I said to her was, "I love you." She died from stomach cancer, fighting a horrendous battle for nearly nine months when the doctors' prognosis was even less than that. Watching her deteriorate was such an utterly gut-wrenching experience. When she lost all her hair from chemo, she, so unwilling to lose the rest of her femininity, kept the remains of her hair in a Ziploc bag. She couldn't bring herself to throw it away.

A decade may have passed, but my mother lives on through me and my brother. Her fighting spirit, her courage, and our memories are forever instilled in us. No one can ever take that away. And so, with that, I am dedicating today's blog post with a letter written for my 'ma' (as I always have called her).

Disneyland, California, 1992.

My Dearest Ma,

I miss you so much. With each passing day, I miss you more and more. I still think about you every single day. A helpless feeling at times, you are constantly on my mind. I long to see your face again. To see your radiant smile which could light up an entire room, the purity of your heart could warm the bleakness of any stranger. I yearn for those sleepless nights of watching Court TV together all the while gossiping and laughing at the jokes we'd crack while snacking down on popcorn or GyeongDan hardcore. I deeply crave your home-cooked meals, the embrace of your soft, silk-like hands. Even all those cheesy, superstitious yet romantic Korean folklore tales; they were the best of stories. Hell, I even miss you yelling at me in Korean when I really got into trouble. And most of the time I was asking for it. I was difficult. And you were an angel. Still one. You're my guardian angel.

I would love to sit here and think you and Dad are immensely proud of me in all my successes/accomplishments, but the bittersweet taste of death resonates within even the smallest of victories, finding it meaningless and insurmountable in reflection to what is missing in my life; what really matters in life. Why did you have to go so soon? Are you taking care of Dad now that you've been reunited? How is Dad? I hope he is not too angry with me. I can't even begin to explain how much he missed you. When you died, he died right along with you.

Why can't I visit you and Dad in my dreams? Don't you miss me too? I hope you're watching over your son, who (I know you're very upset with the both of us) refuses to communicate with me. I have tried to reach out in every imaginable way and his message is clear. He wants nothing to do with me. Like the both of you, I'm also dead to him. This breaks my heart.

Perhaps it's because I'm far too much of a painful, heart-stricken reminder of what and who was lost. Being the spitting image of you and inheriting 100% of Dad's rock-n-roll soul, I'm sure it's tough not to link the two together. But I pray that we will one day find a resolution, and come to terms with our tragedies. I pray we see each other again soon before it's too late and one of us is lying on his/her death bed. I'm not sure how much longer I can hold on to this kind of hope because quite frankly, it's eating me alive.

Remember when I was young and dumb and how ridiculous I felt about your 'jungle safari', as I called it? Well, I've got a lil' 'garden' of my own now. Lots of succulents, flowers and plants that aren't too difficult to maintain, and I may not have a green thumb, but I'm working on it! And with that, I've grown as a person too. I've learned to take better care of myself and I hope you can see all the vessels of my heart being out-poured to the world - that you did not die in vain.

You raised (I think) a pretty capable, strong-willed and intelligent woman. It is all through your love and dedication of being the best mother you could be. Thanks for giving me a really hard time and challenging me. I am such an individual today, with no fear of my voice and the power that comes with it. My one and only - the most important part of me, most often feels like it's the only thing I've got left. And I'm really okay with it. So, really, thank you for never giving up on calling me out on my bullshit and refusing to allow a daughter to grow up to become some punk kid.

I promised to you I wouldn't be sad, but at times my heart just aches from so many losses. But then I'll see a white butterfly. One time, two summer's ago, you brushed against my cheek with one of your wings, and I knew it was you. That warm, magnetic touch was palpable. I know your visits are infrequent and short, but I soak in every moment spent with you. And I look at my boys, knowing you must have had something to do with that too. Thank you for bringing Gilles and maQ into my life. Without them, I'm not sure where I'd be. Their unconditional love always reminds me of you. So very much.

I love you with all my heart and soul. I wish you were here to share with me in all of life's endeavors, but I know I will see you soon. Until then, please watch over everyone I love. Even the ones who have deeply hurt me. To the one who are filled with hate - watch over them more so. I will continue to pray for the world.

엄마 사랑 해요

Always Love (& xx's),

maQ + suz

Unakite Necklace Giveaway!

Happy Monday! I'm starting this week off with another jewelry giveaway! This month I've teamed up with an Etsy store called Breezy Please run by the amazingly talented Shannon Boyce. Located in Las Vegas, Shannon creates wire wrapped necklaces with chakra stones and other unique pieces like pendents and even earrings.

Ain't she a beaut?! Let me tell you a little more about this precious stone, unakite.

Unakite, also called epidote, comes from the Greek epidosis, which means- growing together. It is a combination of red jasper and green epidote solidly bound, originally first discovered in the Unakas Mountains in North Carolina. From the combo, we get the meaning of what comes together, belongs together.

This is a highly Spiritual stone. It will bring though serenity and optimisim in regards to the future and will also aid your spiritual growth. This is a great stone to use during the difficult times the world is currently going through. Unakite has a protective element within its make-up and will help you to release negative energies and addictions that may be holding you back.

Unakite Jasper is a stone that encourages visionary abilities by opening your psychic vision. It works through the third eye chakra and aids you to visualize what you desire in your life. It also has a powerful vibration within the heart and thymus chakras, also known as the higher heart chakra. The higher heart chakra encompasses love and compassion, as well as love of self.

So how do you enter to win this necklace for FREE? All you have to do is go to the end of this post, like the article, then comment about what you are digging most about this necklace! There are also a couple of extra freebies which are loaded in nothing but positive vibes- I'm including a Quartz piece cell phone charm, which fits into the headphone port on any phone or device AND there is also a little bit of white desert sage and a small quartz point, bad energy be gone!

Now, there is also one other way you can enter! If you have an Instagram account, please go to my IG profile (@suzannespiegoski) and do these 3 simple steps:

1. Like the photo of the necklace. 

2. Follow me @suzannespiegoski and @callmebreezy42

3. Tag 2 friends in the comment section.

The winner will be contacted directly this Friday, 11-6. 👏 Good luck guys! 😘

Got questions? I aim to answer them :) and happily so! Please feel free to fire away down in the comment box or contact me here. You can also catch me on Twitter and Google+ which I'm frequently on.

Have a great week everyone! Stay tuned for upcoming graffiti trending in nyc and a fun, new Korean-infused recipe! Oooooooh..... :)

Love & xx's,

maQ + suz

Rodan + Fields Sampling

Happy Hump Day everyone! What a dreary, gloomy day here in New York City. Yuck! I hope you're all staying warm and dry today! This week, my lovely friend, Alice, generously offered me some skincare products from Rodan + Fields to review. From what I can tell, most of the current Rodan and Fields reviews are pretty fantastic. Here are the following samples I received:

Rodan + Fields ENHANCEMENTS Micro-Dermabrasion Paste - use this to first and in the morning! Gently massage the paste onto dry skin in the a.m to enhance cell turnover and improve skin tone and texture. For gentler exfoliation, add water. You can use this up to 3x per week as tolerated. I loved it! My face felt clean and refreshed, and not too exfoliated like some other exfoliants I've tried in the past. I could feel the dead skin cells being gently removed and the tone of my skin was amazing afterward! A wonderful glow to it, really!

REDEFINE Night Renewing Serum - After cleansing and toning in the evening, apply the serum (blue ample) over the entire face (avoid eye area) to visibly improve skin texture and firmness and reduce the appearance of wrinkles. This serum worked well on my face but left it a tad dry, but my skin always becomes drier during the Fall/Winter seasons so I just finished with a moisturizer to balance it off. I enjoy using serums at night because while you're getting your beauty sleep, these little guys are hard at work! I also don't have many wrinkles (not yet at least) so it was hard to notice any change in that. Overall, a great serum product to use while you catch up on resting!

REDEFINE Lip Renewing Serum - Apply this serum (gray ample) to smooth lip texture, reduce the appearance of lip wrinkles and increase moisturization. Okay, ladies. I'm truly obsessed. The following morning, my lips felt like a rose petal. Silky, satiny, and 100% soft! I always get very dry, chapped lips during this season, and this serum was the perfect 'potion' to remedy my puckeroos! A definite recommendation, for sure!

REDFINE Acute Care Skincare for Expression Lines - This should be used in conjunction with your nighttime skincare routine. Don't use it on active acne or areas of sensitivity, redness or irritation. I got a defined wrinkle right in between my eyebrows from all the squinting I've done burning the midnight oil with my writing and other projects. I saw a subtle change after using one application, but not enough to say that it'll make any wrinkle disappear overnight! This takes time (up to 10 applications) to notice a difference. But I would strongly recommend this product for women who are battling with some wrinkles!

Interested in trying any of these products and more from Rodan + Fields? Please contact my friend, Alice! Here's the deal, just email her for a consultation and mention my blog, and you'll get the sign up fee of $19.95 waived! Pretty groovy, right? Did I mention discounts, free shipping and then some? Score!

Alice Kim

Rodan + Fields Independent Consultant

email: alicekimRandF@gmail.com

I thoroughly enjoyed these samples! My complexion feels revived, more luminous and youthful-looking than ever before! Thank you so much, Alice! And isn't my girlfriend just the cutest? I was just telling her today how adorable she looks with those pigtails! I could never pull it off! Don't forget to contact her for your own personal face goodies! And please refer my blog for your free sign up today!

Stay cozy my friends! ♥

Love & xx's,

maQ + suz